“Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future!” I can't tell you how many times I've heard this statement. From teachers, parents, grandparents, and other key people in my life, it seems this statement has been passed down from generation to generation. It’s true. Who we spend time with can strongly influence how we live our lives! As a youth pastor, I communicate this statement over and over.
Who we call “friends” seriously matters! Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, states that "close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives." Dr. Carlin Flora, author of "Friendfluence: The Surprising Ways Friends Make Us Who We Are," states: “Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together.”
According to God’s Word, we must make friends that point us toward Jesus and the God-given purposes for our lives. Ask yourself - are the people I spend time around pointing me toward God or away from Him? Scripture shows us the danger of walking with the wrong people.
1 Corinthians 15:33 NLT Don't be fooled by those who say such things, for "bad company corrupts good character."
HAVE YOU BEEN NEGATIVELY INFLUENCED BY THE WRONG PEOPLE?
I believe it’s a safe bet to say the answer to that question is yes. The wrong people can influence us in the wrong ways! Let’s look into God’s Word to help us drive this article today, shall we? Let’s jump into the story of Job in the Old Testament today. At this point in the story, God has freely allowed Satan to test Job with trials and tribulations. Job’s friends have gone from supportive to critical in their speech to Job.
Job 22:4-11 NLT [4] Is it because you're so pious that he accuses you and brings judgment against you? [5] No, it's because of your wickedness! There's no limit to your sins. [6] "For example, you must have lent money to your friend and demanded clothing as security. Yes, you stripped him to the bone. [7] You must have refused water for the thirsty and food for the hungry. [8] You probably think the land belongs to the powerful and only the privileged have a right to it! [9] You must have sent widows away empty-handed and crushed the hopes of orphans. [10] That is why you are surrounded by traps and tremble from sudden fears. [11] That is why you cannot see in the darkness, and waves of water cover you.
With poor discernment and understanding, Job’s friend, Eliphaz, did not encourage Job to trust God in hardship - he accused Job of evil and wrongdoing. This response to Job shows a lack of understanding in their friend, whom Scripture called a man of righteousness, and a lack of understanding in God, assuming God was angry and punishing Job.
We all have experienced a friend like Job’s sometime in our lives - someone who does not encourage and point us back to God but throws shame and guilt on us. True friends should always encourage us toward God and not into guilt and shame.
There will be moments in our lives when a friend might seem like they are attacking or judging us, but if they are coming out of an abundance of love and patience with us, pointing us towards God, it’s our role to stay teachable and hear them out. I’ve had friends come to me this way, and it was so freeing and encouraging. A true friend is one who will always look out for you no matter how hard the conversation might be and who always points us back toward God. That’s what we all need. Friends that point us toward God.
Proverbs 13:20 CSB The one who walks with the wise will become wise, but a companion of fools will suffer harm.
Who we walk alongside can drastically influence the direction we walk. It’s also been said that your friends are leading you in two directions – closer to God or away from God. Job’s friends were a great example of what it means to walk with the foolish. Thankfully, Job was wise and trusted God despite his poor friends.
Standing firm is hard when we surround ourselves with the wrong people. However, many of us are guilty of the opposite! We compromise, people please, and forsake wisdom for whatever our friends are doing.
We need to surround ourselves with people who will encourage us toward God and are following Jesus themselves! You may need to remove a friend who is a negative influence and purposely walk through life with someone who loves Jesus and points you back to God daily.
REMEMBER, SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO LOVE JESUS.
If you have surrounded yourself with all the wrong people, it’s not too late to turn around and walk with the wise. Find friends who will point you to Jesus! A great place to find people who can positively influence your life is at a local church near you. Whatever you do, don’t do life alone; doing life alone is just plain boring.
Please don't hesitate to reach out if you need anything or someone to talk to. 901-515-6450. God never called us to walk through life alone. The best is yet to come in your life.
